I recently took my mother-in-law to a homeschool playgroup, mostly to prove to her that my kids socialize (she hates the idea of homeschooling), and she commented that she didn’t expect so many older mothers. She didn’t say “normal-looking” older mothers, but I know that’s what she meant.

Like you I’m trying to find a different way of living, that is not simply one of conforming and fitting in with what civilisation demands of us. I am now officially sick of being a wage slave, but haven’t yet broken free. You are much further along the road of making changes than I am.

In terms of people’s response to your chosen lifestyle I now firmly believe that people suffer from two fundamental characteristics that are the cause of the modern malaise – gullibility and denial.

People believe that civilisation is right and works for everyone. Once you start peeling back the layers you wonder how anyone could believe this stuff, and agree to live this way as a wage slave. But most people (99.999%) never question this and just believe whatever they are told. That’s one of the goals of school of course – to train young children to unquestionably accept and believe whatever they are told by someone in an authority position.

And to compensate for believing rubbish, the defence reaction is one of denial. Point out the fallacies in what people believe and how civilisation works, and everyone just denies it. Point blank. Rather than actually consider what you have said and the implications of it, they simply deny what you have said. It is far easier and simpler for them to state that you are wrong, rather than face up to the consequences of what you are saying.

This is also completely the way all religions work – get the gullible person to believe the rubbish you are pushing at them, without any prove or evidence to back it up. When they do start believing this rubbish, get them to deny all other possibilities, regardless of whatever evidence there is one way or the other.

So don’t be surprised by other people’s reactions to your choice of lifestyle. I firmly believe that 99.999% of everyone brought up in modern civilisation will deny the rightness of the changes you personally want to make. And so they will all claim that it is you who is wrong, and not them. And that you should give it all up and go back to the way they all are. Don’t. Ignore them as the gullible fools they are, and carry on with what you are doing.

Posted by: John | 08/03/2007

First, I want to thank you for writing about “The Different Drum.” I checked it out from the library straightaway, and found it to be quite edifying, though I’m sad to see that Peck’s organization that he set up has disbanded since his death. Not surprised, just sad.

I’d also like to piggyback to what the previous poster said and add that people are getting a payoff out of the denial and gullibility that is endemic to our collective toxiculture. I have lived my whole life having to negotiate when I push and when I flow and when I pull out of the way. Being in recovery helps, but even there I can find some resistance to the things I perceive that we will all have to face.

The reason I wanted to post however, was because of the last part of your entry, and the “giving up” of the notion of living in a village. It’s so interesting about that phenomenon, and I just wanted to pass on an inspirational film for you to consider. It’s called “Big Eden” and it was made in 2001, directed by Thomas Bezucha. That film, more than anything, has sort of given me a notion of “True North” as it were. It’s kind of accidental about how it seems to pertain to anti-civ stuff, but I’ve watched it 8 times and I’ve cried tears of recognition and deepest longing each time. Take it FWIW.

Posted by: Richard | 08/03/2007

Great post, Aaron!

I feel the limitations of the internet all the time. There are lots of people who think the way I do about stuff, but they live far away. Either in a different state, or in a different country. But the people I’m surrounded by in real life don’t necessarily see things the same way I do. But that’s not entirely bad, methinks. I have friends who knit, so I can knit with them and talk about whatever, even if they don’t “get it” about civilization.

It would be nice to have both, though.

Another thing that bothers me about the internet is the lack of civility. People seem to feel that because you aren’t a person sitting in front of them, then you aren’t a person…period…and they spew any manner of vitriol your way.

As for people not accepting your lifestyle, I can relate. My mother still harps on my getting a washer and dryer. I have a laundry room in my apartment building but I still prefer to just use the bucket-and-plunger method. My mom just can’t wrap her mind around it. And yesterday, my aunt asked me if I had a bed, yet. I have a mattress that sits on the floor, but that freaks people out that I don’t have a box spring and head board. Who needs it? It’s just extraneous crap. What’s wrong with a mattress on the floor or doing laundry by hand in a bucket?

Posted by: Marcy | 08/03/2007

John, you’re completely right about the state most people are in, and I am capable of ignoring them and could even survive that way, but it’s so much better to live with proper support.

Richard, I just thought the links to that organisation were broken but that does explain it. I’ll look for that film but the local video shop in Raglan is pretty limited to say the least.

Marcy, Was it you who said you weren’t going to have any kids? If so, it’s just as well because if your mother can’t cope with those things you’d probably give her a heart attack with the ‘abnormal’ things you’d do with children

Posted by: Aaron | 08/04/2007

Hey, thanks for the honorable mention. I, too, have realized at times I’m blindly following links and typing in weird google searches trying to find some new thought that stimulates me. The flesh and blood humans I come into contact with are overwhelmingly just consumer ants, madly scrabbling for cash and working just as hard to spend it.
So your trackback led me here and gave me the feeling that somebody else is on the same radio station.
Namas te,
comrade simba

Posted by: comrade simba | 08/05/2007

Hey Comrade, nice to see you over here

Posted by: Aaron | 08/06/2007